Friday, September 30, 2005

I'm a Beautiful Disaster

After a really good year long run, my laptop has decided it hates me. Now, honestly, if any of you out there are amazing computer people, tell me what it means when your windows screen starts to load, then everything goes black except for this:

10
?????

I feel like I’m reading some damn code or something…like I’m supposed to be flying into Paris to steal the “micron” or something equally Alias-esque…

My lap top dying saddens me in many ways…mostly because my back up for all my works of fiction are in a box…which is still in Las Vegas…(seriously…don’t even ask.) I get very antsy with my fictions…sometimes I just need to read them…you know, like some guys just have to put their hands down their pants…like, to make sure it’s still there or something? Yeah, same situation here…

So, basically I’m walking around like a guy without a penis…follow me? No? Huh…must have missed something in the analogy.

Moving on then…

Lauren’s coming to Toronto a week today…which is amazing, yet completely frightening because I thought I still had another week to get my shit together. Sigh…no, must get everything together now…Well, I’m lucky I have connections, because I managed to get a last minute room at the HILTON downtown…so we can walk to the hockey game, and walk to the bars and such…get completely too drunk, and not have to drive home…I’m hoping some Hockey players themselves get thrown into the mix…but that’s MY fantasy…after all, I am Canadian.

In other news of the strangely bizarre, Lauren and I spent yesterday evening looking up old high school people on face book…haha, the memories…especially when Prom is brought up…

Ah, Prom…I had a great Prom…I went with a guy I was in love with…(and stayed in love with for almost four years)…had the cutest little dress, a great dinner, great pictures…and a fever of almost 100*F…yeah, okay, that part sucked. But compared to everyone else who played musical dates or “best pissed off face” on the dance floor, I really did have a great time.

MGFM (My gay friend Matt), called me today…he’s sick too, which is only funny because we start to cough at the same time during our phone conversations. So, he starts to plan out my weekend with Lauren, then realizing I already *ahem* have some plans, asks me to give him the lowdown then he’ll make adjustments as necessary. See, this is why I need to make more money…I need a personal assistant to get my life organized. I mean, the kid cleaned out my car for me…HILARIOUS. Apparently we got each other sick…which makes the no boyfriend thing even funnier.

Speaking of no boyfriend…

I got a really nice compliment from one of my exes the other day. E-mail style, so it’s documented forever…Nice, hu? Anyways I was writing to him about maybe being ready for a new “long term” relationship, and he writes back that he’s looking as well, but he’s not finding much because, in his own words: “I think I was spoiled by you.”

I think I’m taking far too much joy in that statement. Maybe it has to do with all the crap that went on right before I left Vegas…Who knows for sure? But it was nice to have that reformation. Especially since everyone I know is pretty much THISCLOSE to getting married. Crazy kids…


Enough for now…more to come later…meanwhile…

“Oh, and I don't know
I don't know what he's after
But he's so beautiful
He's such a beautiful disaster
And if I could hold on
Through the tears and the laughter
Would it be beautiful
Or just a beautiful disaster?”

Quote of the Moment: “Anytime you overhear people, if you only hear a second of what they say, it's always completely stupid.”
Soundtrack of the Moment: Kelly Clarkson, “Beautiful Disaster”
Movie/TV Quote: From Closer, “It's a lie. It's a bunch of sad strangers photographed beautifully, and... all the glittering assholes who appreciate art say it's beautiful 'cause that's what they wanna see. But the people in the photos are sad, and alone... But the pictures make the world seem beautiful, so... the exhibition is reassuring which makes it a lie, and everyone loves a big fat lie.”

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