I’m sure it’s something that is really obvious to all of you out there. You guys see through my shit pretty easily. Still, it surprised me the other day…just standing around a work shelving books. And I was grinning like an idiot. Happy, just for the sake of it. Not because I’m trying so hard.
Just like everything, it all seems to go together. I’ve been doing my hair every day, changing my makeup and just generally taking care of me. If you’re a guy, none of that may sound like anything, but if you’re a girl, I think you’ll understand. There’s something about wanting to be cute and put myself out there that just doesn’t happen unless I’m really, truly happy.
The last time I remember feeling this way was when I had my agent and was filming in Houston…and Austin. I really, truly started to just have fun for me. I miss that (not necessarily the filming, but the happy)…or I do now…now that I’m realizing there was something to miss in the first place.
Some of this is likely the whole quarter-life crisis thing…or, maybe it’s not, but it seems possible. Maybe…hmm. Regardless, I’m getting off track here. What was I talking about?
Another thing that might make sense for most people is my connection with Britney Spears. Ha. It’s not like we’re actually friends. I’ve never even met the girl. (Someone please tell me how I’ve run into Paris Hilton twice and yet have never managed to be in the same room as Britney Spears? Seriously?) I did do a song and dance routine to Crazy back in high school, playing Britney. Britney was one of my two most used nicknames. I just…I feel a kinship with the girl, okay?
So it makes me really, super happy to see her fit and smiling and talking about coming back out of the darkness. She says this line, “I’m a smart girl…what the hell was I thinking?” and I’m sitting there (that’s a blatant lie, I was dancing around my living room and seeing if I could still do a triple pirouette without getting dizzy) and I start smiling and nodding at her. I get you, Brit-babe. Been there, with you, hope the best for you.
Happiness is fun. And, weirdly it’s probably the only thing that I can say (with zero self-consciousness and total confidence) looks good on me. Happiness looks good on me.
Quote of the Moment: "If I lived back then, I’d totally have both hands cut off. My tongue, probably too.”
Soundtrack of the Moment: Britney Spears, “Circus”
TV/Movie Quotes: Garden State: If you can't laugh at yourself, life's gonna seem a whole lot longer than you like.